


Kyle's Boomin' Time Travel

by KPesh123



Series: Kyle's Boomin' Adventures [4]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Beer, Best Friends, Binge Drinking, Childhood Friends, China, Civil War, Comedy, Comedy of Errors, Communism, Dark Comedy, Drinking, Excessive Drinking, Friendship, Fucking, Good Writing, Heavy Drinking, Late Night Writing, Other, POV Jesus Christ (Abrahamic Religions), Porn, Rape, References to Hitler, References to Shakespeare, Religion, Romeo and Juliet References, Science Fiction, Science Fiction & Fantasy, Shakespeare Quotations, Shakespearean Comedy, Shakespearean Language, Smoking, Tequila, Time Travel, Underage Drinking, Underage Smoking, Vodka, Whiskey & Scotch, Wine, World War II, Writing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 09:33:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25847377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KPesh123/pseuds/KPesh123
Summary: Times start to get tough for Kyle and The Boys.  Running low on supplies, Malcolm stumbles upon a time travel device.  Kyle and The Boys proceed to go back in time and witness historical events.
Series: Kyle's Boomin' Adventures [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1867981
Kudos: 1
Collections: laugh out loud





	Kyle's Boomin' Time Travel

**Author's Note:**

> Please make sure to read my previous works in Kyle's Boomin' Adventures.

Kyle’s Boomin Time Travel

(Disclaimer: Typos in the quotations are done on purpose. My shitty rendition of accents.)

Times started to get tough for the boys. Ever since the apocalypse and the battle against the Pit Kids, they took over the old Acme, growing weed and brewing their own beer. Things went well at first, but eventually products started to run out. The boys had made it back to square one again looking for food and booze. Their hometown, Parkersville, had become an equivalent to Pripyat, the abandoned city near Chernobyl which was left unattended after the nuclear explosion. In Parkersville, the people had gone up and left, finding new sources for food. The boys stayed behind and held onto Acme. Every now and then one of them would go out into the town to find anything that could be beneficial. This time Malcolm was on scavenger duty, the boys sat in the back of the Acme.

“Dude fuck this, we lost almost all of our food in a month.” Kyle commented.

“How did we lose it so fast?” Gianni asked.

“All we did the past month was eat, have you seen Malcolm lately? He’s become the dead ringer for Balti.” Kyle responded. 

Balti was this mentally challenged kid that used to hang around Malcolm. All he did was piss everyone off and get Malcolm busted with weed in front of his dad. The freshman fifteen hit Balti immensely. It would’ve been more accurate to call it the freshman fifty in Balti’s case. 

“Oh yea.” Nick said. “What the fuck are we going to do?” 

“We’re basically waiting to die at this point.” Mark said. 

“Hey guys I’m back with something very interesting.” Malcolm said walking into the room. 

Malcolm waddled in. He had gained weight since he ate all of the food in the store. With bag zits and a sweaty forehead, Malcolm threw a circular disk on the table.

“What the fuck is this? A condom for a used up hooker?” Jon asked.

“No you dunce, it’s a time travel device. I was ravaging through one of the houses and found it. You know what I’m thinking?” 

“We go back in time and stop the Chinese government from wiping out the world?” Jon asked.

“No you retard, we go back in time and prevent myself from getting fat.” 

“Let’s do both.” Jay commented. 

Malcolm dropped the disk on the floor and it widened. The boys stepped on it. Jon put in the date for the day after the battle with the Pit Kids. Soon the boys were surrounded by a blue vortex that sent them through a hole which led them to a month prior when Malcolm was still skinny. Malcolm found his past self. 

“Don’t eat that!” Malcolm shouted as he smacked the bag of doritos out of his former selves hand.

“God dammit! What the fuck?! Why would you fucking do that you fat fuck?!” Past Malcolm shouted.

“You fucking retard I’m you from the future! In one month you will eat all the food and gain this weight! It’s fun to fuck fat bitches, not be one!!!” Malcolm yelled.

“Fuck you I’m fucking hungry! Give me the chips!” Past Malcolm yelled.

Both the past boys and the current boys stood in shock. This was a sight never seen before. Malcolm always had an anger problem. Malcolm’s stubbornness was his downfall. But now Past Malcolm was so stubborn that he wouldn’t even listen to his future self giving him important advice. The two began to wrestle and moan. Mark walked over, picked Past Malcolm up, and threw him down an aisle, the boys got on the disk and set the date for December 1st 2019, around the time the Coronavirus started. Their destination was Wuhan China. 

After being in the hole, they emerged in the middle of a Chinese market, Malcolm was skinny again. Pollution was rampant, people were yelling at each other in chinese. Looking around the boys saw dogs and cats being slaughtered on spot. Amongst all the chaos, Kyle noticed Andrew Zimmern, host of Bizzare Foods, eating a fried dog. Zimmern was stuffing his face into that pooch as if there was no tomorrow. The boys started to wander the streets looking for a stand selling cum filled fried bats. After seeing around ten fried dog stands, they found a stand named “Chicken of the Cave.” A reference of Anchorman Two, the boys couldn’t help but laugh. They got their shit together and approached the stand. 

“Hey do you run this stand?” Jon asked.

“Wha? Wha you mean?!” The clerk responded. 

“You serve fried bats here?” Kyle asked.

“Fried bats? Twenty dora!” 

“Get him!” Malcolm shouted. 

The boys jumped the counter and attacked the clerk. Rounds of punching left him bruised badly. Kyle pulled out a handgun.

“We know you work for the government! Take us to them!” Kyle shouted.

“Okay Okay! Hory Shit!” The clerk shouted. 

The next thing the boys knew, they had a Chinese store clerk working for the government at gunpoint taking them to Beijing. Looking out the window of the car, all that was seen were fields and factories. 

“Hey look it’s the Nike factory!” Malcolm shouted.

There was a giant Nike logo on the smokestacks. Below, the boys could see employers whipping the children as they made shoes. Michael Jordan was standing amongst them smoking a fat cigar, dunking on the little kids. 

They made it to Beijing. The Clerk took the boys to the capital where they met President Xi Jingping. The boys were surprised that they weren’t stopped by the secret police there. They approached the President. 

“Look, we don’t want to waste your time. But we are from the future and we know about the virus you are developing in those bats. We know you are triggered because Trump made you his bitch but you’re literally going to destroy the entire world with this disease.” Kyle told President Jingping. 

“Fucka da you! That orange man made me his bitch! Nobody makes me a bitch!” President Jingping responded furiously. 

“That chastity belt sticking through your pants says otherwise.” Malcolm responded.

Through the President’s pants, it was very noticeable that he was wearing a chastity belt. Engraved in the device said “Trump Chastity Belt.” It was obvious Trump was laying his claim into the deviant sex industry since it was very profitable. 

“Oh you a dead man! I have you killed and fed with dog!” President Jingping responded. 

“Ight lets rush him.” Mark said. 

The boys proceeded to jump the President of China. Their anger built up from months in quarantine, dealing with the National Guard, fighting zombies and the Pit Kids built up. When the boys were finished they backed up. The President was almost unrecognizable, bruised and bloodied beyond belief. His guards stood in shock. The boys jumped back on the disk. 

Instead of landing back home in the modern day, they landed in a bedroom in what looked like a rural community. The boys were confused beyond belief. 

“What the fuck? Where the fuck are we now?” Malcolm asked.

Looking around the room, Kyle noticed two particular things that made it obvious of their location. On the wall was a poster of The Smiths. Lipstick was all over Morrisey’s face. In the corner of the room was a cutout of Bernie Sanders, that too had makeup smeared all over its face. 

“God fucking damnit!” Kyle hissed. “We are in Nancy fucking Drew’s room.” 

“Fuck!” Malcolm shouted.

A loud cry was made from the bed. Nancy Drew was in the bed, head buried in a pillow, crying uncontrollably. Kyle knew that Nancy was a depressed headcase who had no life in high school. Even worse, Nancy always came to Kyle’s dorm to cry about the most useless shit. Needless to say, Kyle knew how to deal with Nancy when she was down. With the boys looking, Kyle walked over and sat on the bed. 

“Hey, you don’t know me yet but I’m here for you, I’ll listen. What’s the problem kiddo?” Kyle asked in a caring way. 

“Nobody likes me at my school! I wanted to stand out and get attention so I sat for the National Anthem, I’m a pariah now.” Nancy cried.

“Awww, it’s okay, now listen to me.” Kyle put his arm around Nancy to console her. She leaned in to feel better. “You will amount to nothing, you hear me? You’re nothing but an over achieving attention seeking whore who makes people such as me feel like absolute shit. You deserve to feel this way. Go fuck yourself you cunt.” 

Kyle walked away coldy as Nancy sat in shock. She started to cry even worse than before. The boys also stood speechless. They couldn’t comprehend what they just saw. 

“Damn Kyle that was pretty cold.” Mark said.

“Shut the fuck up and get on the disk.” 

The boys jumped on the disk and left Nancy to cry alone. The disk brought them to an office in the World Trade Center in New York City. It was a crisp fall morning and there was not a cloud in the sky.

“Okay why is this thing not taking us home? And why the fuck are we in the World Trade Center?” Nick asked. 

“I don’t know how to work this thing. Let’s just keep trying.” Malcolm said. 

“Hey now’s a good time to get on.” Kyle said looking out the window. 

Out the window was a plane coming directly at them. In a mad panic the boys jumped on and left as soon as the plane hit the building. They dodged a bullet, or a plane rather.

The boys landed in what looked like 1970’s Vietnam. They could tell because the song Fortunate Son by Creedence Clearwater Revival was playing non stop just to add to the Vietnam stereotype. They were in a whore house with a bunch of American soldiers. The boys knew fully well that these prostitutes were actually cross dressing men so they avoided it. Malcolm on the other hand, was incredibly horny.

A prostitute took Malcolm by the hand and brought him into the private room. The boys sat outside for five minutes. At first it sounded as if Malcolm was giving the prostitute anal. 

“Yea you like that? I bet you do you dirty little slut!” Malcolm shouted. 

“Hory Shit Mirky! Ret me try!” The prostitute responded.

“Wait wha-? No, no! No! NO!!! REEEEEE REEEEEE REEEEEE!” Malcolm screeched as he was getting anally raped by a transgender Vietnamese prostitute. 

Malcolm hobbled out, his asshole widened more than Gretch’s pussy. This debunked the stereotype of Asians having small penises because Malcolm’s asshole was permanently ruined.

“Damn you can’t catch a break with getting raped huh Malcolm.” Nick said. 

“Fuck you.” Malcolm said, crying.

“Let’s just go back in time and prevent it from happening.” Jon said. 

“Okay.” 

The boys set the date for a minute before Malcolm was taken into the room. Malcolm took a gun and shot the prostitute in the head. Past Malcolm was livid.

“Goddamnit! Why the fuck did you cock block me?!” Past Malcolm yelled. 

“That hooker was a man! I did you a favor!” Malcolm responded.

“Fuck you I was gonna get laid!” Past Malcolm yelled. 

“We don’t have time for this, Malcolm hop on the disk.” Kyle said.

Even when being saved from a rape session, Malcolm was stubborn enough to despise himself for it. The boys left the brothel and ended up in 1960’s Washington D.C. A civil rights rally was taking place. Malcolm X and Martin Luther King Jr. were slap boxing each other over who’s method was better. A young Spike Lee was jacking off in the front row. Dumb founded by what they just saw, the boys walked down the reflection pool. There they saw a young man with curly hair and glasses getting thrown out of the event by police. He had a heavy Jewish accent and was rambling off about communism. Kyle was immediately furious as his arch nemesis Bernie Sanders was in front of him. While being dragged out Bernie was shouting nonsense. 

“No I will not get a job until I’m president! Fuck our economy! These retards need free healthcare and schooling! We need breadlines! Breadlines I tell you! I jack off to Karl Marx and Stalin! Fuck me Lenin! Fuck me Daddy Lenin!” Bernie was shouting. 

Once the police dropped him he got up. Kyle walked over to him. Bernie was talking to himself about communism. He didn’t seem to notice Kyle standing in front of him. 

“Hey are you Bernie Sanders?” Kyle asked politely. 

“Yea, who the fuck are you?!” Bernie shouted. 

“I just want to tell you something.” 

“What?” 

Kyle punched Bernie in the stomach, kneed him in his tiny cock, and proceeded to punch Bernie in the face repeatedly. Once Bernie was down Kyle smashed his foot into Bernie’s face, glass shattered in his eye Bernie was hunched over crying like a little bitch. 

“That’s what you get for ruining colleges across America you jackass!” Kyle shouted, spitting on him after. 

The boys were cracking up as they had heard Kyle’s stories and felt his pain. Kyle approached them. 

“Let’s get the fuck out of here.” 

The boys got on the disk and landed in what appeared to be an office building. The technology was not as advanced and it smelled like gunpowder. The boys looked outside to find a city in ruin.

“Where the fuck are we now?” Jay asked.

“By the giant swastika on the wall here I assume Nazi Germany.” Nick said. 

“Oh Jon, your favorite!” Kyle said laughing. 

“Fuck you Kyle.” Jon replied. 

Jon was the emblem of what Hitler nutted to every night. Blond hair and blue eyes, he had the attitude of a jackass and always picked on Kyle for being Polish. The boys started to look around to see if they could find anything of value to bring home and sell for money. Nick found a draft which was titled “Mein geheimer Kampf.” Translated to My Secret Struggle. 

“Oh it says here that Hitler’s Jewish commanding officer in World War One gassed him and raped his unconcious corpse.” Nick said.

“No wonder he hates the Jews.” Mark responded.

“Hey let’s find him and kick his ass.” Kyle said. 

The boys roamed the halls, looking for the Fuhrer. After looking at twenty different rooms with battle/holocaust plans, they found an unfathomable site. Lying on the ground was the man himself, Adolf Hitler, completely naked. Above Hitler’s face was his mistress, Eva Braun. Eva was squating on top of Hitler’s face shitting into his mouth. This was not what shocked the boys however. They looked down and saw Hitler’s cock. Kyle had read and told the boys about this, but they didn’t believe it until now. Hitler’s dick was as small as a thumb tack, he had one testicle behind it as well. Hitler and Eva looked at the boys in shock as they looked back. 

“This explains so much. No wonder you’re a madman.” Kyle told Hitler. 

“What tze fuck is this? Why is there non aryan blood in mein office?!” Hitler shouted. 

“Hey Kyle, how does it feel that Hitler, the most hated man in the world can get a girlfriend and you can’t?” Jon asked Kyle in a snarky manner.

“Mein Fuhrer this seemingly German boy is a Jew.” Kyle told Hitler in response to Jon’s joke.

“What?! Un Juden in mein quarters?!” Hitler asked angrily. 

Hitler spat the shit out of his mouth, threw Eva away, and injected horse steroids into his neck. The next thing the boys knew, a drugged out naked micropenis Hitler was running full force at the boys. The boys ran to Hitler and tackled him down. The boys punched and kicked the ever living shit out of Hitler. Everyone got a good punch in, leaving the leader of the Thousand Year Reich bruised and bloodied whimpering on the floor. The boys walked out, Kyle stayed and approached Hitler and whispered into his ear…

“Mazel Tov you fuck.” 

Kyle walked out of the room. Eva was speechless as her lover was beaten on the floor. Kyle met up with the boys and they got on the disk. The next thing the boys knew, they were at a library in 19th century London. In the corner was an old man with a mane of grey hair. Kyle knew right away he was staring at Karl Marx. Marx was at a desk writing the draft to the Communist Manifesto. Kyle approached Marx.

“Excuse me Mr. Marx?” 

“Whvat is it?” 

Kyle ripped Marx’s draft out of his hands and threw them aside. Kyle took Marx by the collar of his shirt and punched him around five times.

“That’s just a message from the proletariats.” Kyle said and walked away. 

The boys hopped on the disk. They landed in a small town in 19th Century America. Technology was not advanced, there were many cannons set up. The boys looked at the sign. 

“Welcome to Gettysburg! The most peaceful town in America.” The sign read.

“Ironic.” Gianni said. 

“You know this might be a good time to get some food and watch the battle.” Jay said. 

“That’s right people spectate this shit.” Malcolm commented.

The boys walked into old town Gettysburg and got beer from the local tavern and cooked pig. They stole a quilt hanging up to dry and placed it down on the field. Below them was the bloodiest battle of the Civil War. It was a nice balmy day for the battle. Their meal was cooked just right and the beer gave them a good buzz. Every time the North made an advancement they cheered. The boys were having a fun time, that was until two confederate soldiers spotted Jay and Kyle.

“What do we got here, Skenner?” 

“Ahaha looks like two runaway slaves Mordecai.” 

“Let’s get em!” 

Kyle took out his handgun and shot the two soldiers dead in their tracks. The boys realized that Jay was half black and Kyle was half Guyanese. They had to be careful during these times. They got on the disk once they finished their beer and pig. 

The boys landed in the 18th Century. Kyle felt as if the town looked familiar. They took a walk down the main street, Kyle couldn’t put it on his tongue, but he knew he’d been there before. They made it up a hill to a big estate. 

“Geed Seminary” The sign read.

“God fucking damnit we’re at my school.” Kyle said, annoyed. 

“Jesus it feels like forever since we were here.” Jon stated. 

The boys walked onto the estate to find a surprising display. The founder of the seminary, Daniel Geed, was whipping his black slaves into building more houses and halls. 

“Faster you heathens! I own you! You are my possession! You scum shall build me a school where I can indoctrinate young minds with tolerance and acceptance! Something I’d never give to you animals!” Daniel Geed yelled. 

This did not surprise Kyle in the slightest. At his school, the student population were all left wing nutjobs. They preached insane ideas created by the men Kyle beat up just before. They preached for acceptance and equality as well. They only preached it unfortunately. Back in the first semester, Kyle was telling Nancy Drew about his dorm. 

“Yeah so I got some fireballs in my dorm. I’m going to invite people over, no chance in hell will they drop me.” 

“Ew I’m never going in there, I don’t want to catch your disease.” Nancy said with a bitchy attitude.

“What?”

“You’re Guyanese, you have the Guyanese Disease.” 

Since Kyle’s family came from a third world country in South America, Nancy immediately assumed he had Aids or some other world disease. Even though they all preached left wing ideas, those didn’t apply to Kyle because he was seen as a boomer. Kyle could see through their hypocrisy. Daniel Geed saw Jay.

“Boy! What the fuck do you think you’re doing here! Get back in the shackles where you belong!” Daniel Geed shouted. 

“Fuck you, you pussy ass bitch!” Jay responded, flipping off the slave owner. 

“Hold on I’ll take care of this fuck toy.” Kyle said.

Kyle once again took out his handgun and shot Daniel Geed in the face. Once he was down Kyle proceeded to shoot countless rounds into the dead corpse. 

“That’s for making such a shit education establishment.” Kyle said. “Alright let’s go free the slaves.

“Hold it right there you pencil dick noodlefucks!!!” A loud voice shouted behind them. 

“Holy shit it’s Danny Mullen!!” Kyle yelled.

Danny Mullen, the young up and coming youtuber who made raunchy and politically incorrect videos somehow went back in time and approached the boys. His catchphrase was “Danny Mullen freed the slaves.” Something a fan gave him when he sabotaged a parade. 

“That’s right shit head!! I free the slaves!!! No poser ass bitch is going to copy me!” Danny Mullen shouted.

“Danny I am such a big fan of yours.” Kyle said.

“Well fuck you I’m going to rape your sister while I suck off a pelican!!!” Danny Mullen shouted. 

Once Danny Mullen freed the slaves, they built the Wokanda House on the property of the deceased Daniel Geed. They walked out of the estate and got on the disk. The boys were starting to get annoyed that they were unable to make it home. However they persevered. 

The disk brought them to a shittily built theatre in 15th Century England. On the floor were drunken idiots who stumbled in from the grog shop to watch the show, the upper tier held the elite. The boys went to the floor to witness where they were. 

“Where the fuck are we now?” Malcolm asked.

“Romeo Oh Romeo, spread mine legs and fuck me Romeo!” Shouted the girl on stage.

“Malcolm I believe we are at a Shakespearian play.” Kyle responded. 

“What?! Fuck that douche he made me fail junior year english!” Malcolm yelled. 

Malcolm stormed off, the boys followed. Malcolm was clearly looking for William Shakespeare in order to give him a piece of his mind. Malcolm searched every room until he found a balding man with a mustache and soul patch. He had an enormous collar and was writing with a giant quill. He looked up to find Malcolm staring into his soul.

“Can thy help ye?” Shakespeare asked in a polite manner.

“Because of your retarded book about sex, I failed my english class. You’re gonna fucking pay you douche!” Malcolm yelled.

“What doth ye talking to? Let me write doth wich story in solitude.” Shakespeare responded.

“Oh no you don’t!” Malcolm yelled.

Malcolm threw everything off of Shakespeare’s desk and grabbed him by the collar. Malcolm punched Shakespeare around ten times and spat on his face. Shakespeare had two black eyes and a fat lip. He struggled to get up. 

“Thy sticks and stones cut straight to thy jabs.” Shakespeare said. 

“Malcolm you gotta calm down buddy.” Nick said to Malcolm.

“Ma? Macbeth? Twass perfect for mine story! Thy Tragedy of Macbeth!” Shakespeare yelled. 

Having misheard the name, Shakespeare heard Macbeth instead of Malcolm. Inspired by Malcolm’s sheer brutality, William Shakespeare proceeded to write the play Macbeth, referring back to when Malcolm punched him for inspiration. The boys walked out of the theatre and got on the disk. The disk gave a few sparks and soon the boys were off. Unfortunately the sparks landed on the wooden walls of the Globe Theatre. Soon enough the entire theatre was up in flames. 

The boys landed in ancient Jerusalem. There was a big commotion taking place on a hill. A man had a crown of thorns placed on his head and was carrying an enormous cross up the hill, getting whipped along the way. The boys went to witness the event. Curious as to what was going on, Kyle asked the man next. 

“Hey what’s going on here?” 

“This fucking prick decided to prank a bunch of people, including Julius Ceaser. We are sick of it so we’re crucifying him.” 

“Oh fuck! It’s just a joke bro! It’s just a joke! I didn’t actually steal your nose!” The man getting crucified shouted. 

As it turns out, the man getting crucified was none other than Jesus Christ. Instead of wandering the desert performing miracles, he was a massive douche to everyone pranking them. At the Last Supper, Jesus pretended to steal Judas’s nose. Judas believed it and vowed revenge, thus the crucifixion of Jesus. Kyle turned to the man next to him.

“Hey what’s your name?” 

“King James, nice to meet you.” 

“Listen to me buddy, write down everything you see here. Exaggerate the shit out of it. You’re going to be a millionaire and have an empire that lasts over two thousand years.” 

“Fucking bet man.” 

“Oh fuck!” Shouted Malcolm from a distance. 

Kyle and the boys turned to find Malcolm being tied to a cross and put on the hill. The Romans had found his portable stash of Fat My Little Pony porn. Confused and afraid, they crucified Malcolm. 

“God damnit this fucking sucks!” Malcolm yelled.

“Hey don’t talk about my father like that you dick!” Jesus yelled back.

“Fuck you! You pranked everyone to the point of crucifixion!” 

“Hey at least I don’t jack it to fat porn!” 

“Jesus that’s a low blow!” 

The boys came to Malcolm’s cross and cut it down. They took out their guns and shot off the Romans. Once everyone ran away, they cut down Malcolm and freed him. They began to walk away. Behind them Jesus yelled.

“Hey asshole you forgot about me!” 

“Don’t worry! Sunday you’ll rise and imprint yourself into a rag!” Kyle yelled back.

“The fuck?! That’s literally impossible! You just don’t want to save me!” 

“That’s it buddy, hope you rot up there you retarded fuck!.” 

The boys walked out into the desert, Malcolm was holding the device. They had beat up numerous historical figures, watched a spoiled bitch cry, dodged 9/11, watched the Battle of Gettysburg, and witnessed the crucifixion of a jackass named Jesus Christ. They were ready to go home. Malcolm looked at the device. 

“Oh here’s the problem, I have this thing set to the jump around settings, bringing us to these various events. I gotta change it to normal then we’d be good.” Malcolm said.

“You fucking jackass! You mean to tell me that we wandered through time because you had it at the wrong fucking setting?” Jon asked furiously.

“Yep.”

“That’s it we’re re-crucifying you.” Mark said.

“God damnit.”

“Or we can just go home.” Kyle said. 

The boys came to their senses and got on the device. The blue vortex brought them through the hole going through history. The boys landed back where they started in Acme. Instead of how it was before, isolated and decrepit, it was packed with people. The boys did it, they saved civilization. All they had to do was jump a few historical figures and the world would go back to normal. The boys stole some liquor and went back to Malcolm's place. In honor of their journey they got incredibly fucked up. 

  
  


I hope you enjoyed my Boomin Time Travel, now piss off you dirty cunt! 

  
  



End file.
